Stand by your Principles

At the heart of everything we do as an organisation is Dale Carnegie’s thirty human relations principles. These principles have been with the organisation for many years and the Dale Carnegie itself is celebrating its Centenary in October of this year.

Below is a list of the first 9 principles which covers the foundations of becoming a friendlier person.

Don't criticize, condemn, or complain.
Give honest and sincere appreciation.
Arouse in the other person an eager want.
Become genuinely interested in other people.
Smile.
Remember that a person's name is, to that person, the sweetest and most important sound in any language.
Be a good listener. Encourage others to talk about themselves.
Talk in terms of the other person's interest.
Make the other person feel important – and do it sincerely.

At first glance you may think to yourself that these prinicples are common knowledge. This is true, however they are not common practice.

Look at the list and again and really ask yourself:

How many of these principles am I actually applying?
How often do I apply them?
Which ones do I find really challenging and why?

If these priniciples and questions resonate with you I would encourage you to attend the opening session of our Skills for Success course on the 8th May for free.

You can register for this event by getting in touch with any of our consultants on 0207 379 4323

Amar Garcha

What about worry?

I’m a worrier.

I can’t help it. It seems that my natural reaction to having a bit of free time is to start worrying. I worry about my life, my future, other people and I even worry about the fact that I worry so much! I certainly don’t think I’m alone in this preoccupation of all things negative and what’s more I can prove it. Ask yourself the following question.

When you turn the light off at night and you’re lying in your bed, what do you think about?

Is it money? Is it the bills to pay at the end of the month? How do others perceive me? How’s the job going? What’s the update on that family member whose been struggling?

It’s funny how we hide our worry behind a smile. In the environments that often are the cause of our anxiety we let on that nothing is wrong and act as though we haven’t a care in the world. It’s only when there is nothing else to preoccupy our minds and no one else is around that worry truly takes over.

Worry negatively affects our state of mind, our health, our relationships and our performance. Overcoming it does not come around simply by the way we think; it takes discipline and structure. Here is what Dale Carnegie said on this issue.

"If you want to avoid worry… Live in "day-tight compartments." Don't stew about the future. Just live each day until bedtime."

If worry is something that you struggle with then I strongly urge you to do something about it. Don’t accept it as an inevitable burden you must carry for your life. Don’t let it plague your present, ruin your happiness and cloud your future. As an organisation, Dale Carnegie support individuals in overcoming worry and managing stress. It would be great to discuss with you how we can support you to.

Visit our website or call us on 0207 379 4323.

Brett Mills

Practice makes Permanent

Only three days to go and I am starting to get nervous. I am about to co-host a 2 hour workshop this Thursday and I am finding difficult to focus on anything else. Public speaking played a big part in a previous role and all I can remember is that I loved it. I managed a large sales team and was responsible for motivating them daily. I also had opportunities to speak at large national conferences and lived for it. I actually couldn’t remember what it was like the first time I stood up in front of my team or when I spoke to a large audience. Was I nervous? Was I any good?

Our flagship programme, the Dale Carnegie Course has five key drivers and these are developed over a period of time through, facilitation, practice and coaching. Another medium that is used to develop some of these skills is public speaking. I have spoken to many people over the last 18 months for whom confidence was a fundamental challenge that needed to be overcome. I have assured many people that it is natural to feel nerves when speaking in public. I have advised my clients that everyone gets butterflies, even the most polished presenters. It’s just a matter of turning that into excitement and using it in your favour. I believe there are only two instances where you would not feel nerves before presenting. One is if you don’t care about what you are presenting and the second is if you don’t care about the audience.

I have realized however that it is very easy to fall back into my comfort zone. It has been a while since I last presented and the nerves have kicked in big time. I guess it’s time for me to take my own advice and try to make it work for me. I know the only way for me to become a better presenter is to practice and practice.

If you would like to attend some of our free seminars and course previews and find out how we have supported individual’s, teams and companies to over come challenges and get better results then please follow the link below.

FREE SEMINARS AND PREVIEWS

Hopefully, I’ll be presenting at one of these events.

Have a great week,

Amar

The story so far……

Having come through the second full day of training in the last month to be a Dale Carnegie Coach I am currently experiencing an array of emotions. I am really fired up and enthusiastic but also nervous at the prospect of another session at the end of March and the crucial assessment event taking place over four consecutive days at the back end of April.

My journey started back in September 2010 and I am getting closer to crunch time. I have realized in the last 30 days that becoming a coach is challenging and becoming an excellent coach requires passion, drive, determination, tenacity and an unbelievable amount of effort.

To have the ability to help people improve in their key development areas, coaching in real-time to redirect from ineffectual habits and provide feedback relevant to the learning objectives and the individual’s goals requires practice, practice and more practice.

Needless to say I have a new found respect for my colleagues that consistently and effectively support others to reach their visions.

I have been in the business for 15 months and despite seeing the results of the coaching, I never realised until now the process and effort involved of getting people from where they are to where they need to be, faster and with less anxiety.

Our seminars and previews are designed to give people at least a couple of new ideas that they can implement in their business or private life to improve the results they are getting.

Please visit our website to see a list of our complimentary events you can attend in the coming weeks.

I look forward to supporting you in the near future to achieve your goals.

Have a great weekend.

Amar

Living for Today

A great weekend spent visiting friends in Jersey reminded me of how important it is to live in the present...... That might sound a strange thing to say as surely it's impossible to do anything but live in the present. That said it's amazing how often people focus all their energy on living in the past or only living for the future. Those of us with a disposition to living in the past will tell stories of what we did and 'how great it was back then' where as those of us with a disposition towards the future will say things like when I achieve 'X Y Z' I'll be happy.

I'm not saying that we shouldn't enjoy a little reminiscing about good times in the past or think about things we want to work for in the future! What I'm talking about is seeking to engage fully with what we do and the people we meet each day in order to get a greater sense of fulfilment and satisfaction. It took a walk along a cold and windy beach with my friends their kids and 8 month old black Labrador to remind me of something that I'd forgotten.

I learnt the importance of living in the present from a Dale Carnegie Master trainer back in 2003 he was explaining the importance of being 100% present as he described it when interacting with the people around us and to get the group to understand he wrote up on a flip chart the days of the week and asked us to think of each day of the week as representing 12 years of our lives (This assumes we live on average to 84). He asked the group to identify which day of the week they were physically living on; as I write this now it's pretty late on Wednesday night for me. The question he asked was did we focus our energy on where we physically were or was our mind filled with thoughts of past or present...... Where are you? & Where do you focus your Energy?

Whether we're spending time with friends and family, at work in a meeting, on the phone to a client, working on a project, playing sport or just relaxing. The way to get the best of that moment is to commit yourself 100% to where you are now, who you're with and what you're doing.

I consider myself lucky that I love what I do for a living and have a great team around me and friends and family I want to spend time with yet I know I have a tendency to live in the future and not in the NOW! A black Labrador reminded me of the importance of living for Today....... I hope this has encouraged you to do the same.

What's happening right now is LIFE ...... Make Sure You Give It Everything Today!

David Anderson
Managing Director
Dale Carnegie London

Communication is Fabio-less

120 days and 7 hours before Euro 2012 kicks off England manager Fabio Capello decided to leave his post with immediate effect.

Despite often being referred to as a poisoned chalice due to the intense pressure to succeed as well as the media spotlight following you at every turn, it seems however these were not the reasons behind his sudden departure.

A breakdown in communication with key figures within the FA appears to be the straw that broke the camels back. It is amazing to think that there can be such a major lack of communication in the higher echelons of the English governing body of football.

I work for a company that helps improve the performance of companies by improving the performances of its people.

There are five key drivers that lie at the heart of everything that we do and one of those is enhancing and strengthening communication skills.

If you would like to find out more about this or the other four key drivers as well as the solutions we offer to individuals, teams and companies please feel free to attend any of our free course previews and seminars.



Amar Garcha

P.S. Keeping the importance of good communication at the front of my mind, I would like to thank Brett for the title of this post.

Can a lack of communication be the difference between life and death?

I was shocked about the news this week regarding the Costa Concordia crashing into rocks off Giglio Porto and subsequently sinking. This has resulted in the death of at least 11 people with another 24 still missing. A sad loss of life’s that simply should have been avoided.

In the aftermath, Captain Francesco Schettino has been arrested on suspicion of multiple manslaughter with some reports suggested that he was amongst the first to leave the ship after the crash.

As some of this is unsubstantiated at this moment in time I will refrain from passing my own judgment on the man.

However, recently video footage has been released in which a female crew member is urging passengers to return to their cabins. Passengers were also told that the problem was electrical and confined to the ships generator. Apparently, the footage comes from the period after the ship hit the reef. In another audio tape aired yesterday a crew member is heard describing the situation to a port authority official as a blackout.

Wherever the truth lies regarding what actually happened in the time before and after the crash, I can clearly tell that there was a distinct lack of communication from the crew to the passengers as well as to the port officials.

I work for an organisation that appreciates the importance of communication, whether that is internal to your peers and bosses or external to other stakeholders and clients. We have spent the best part of a century coaching and training people in this area, who are looking to gain credibility, increase team member engagement or simply to develop their own careers.

I love the work I do, so much so that I about to undergo my training to become a trainer / coach for the company and so will be dedicating my life to improving the communication skills (amongst other key soft skill areas) of individuals, teams and companies in the years to come.

I understand that in the current tough economic climate a lack of communication has a massive impact on the ability of an organisation to thrive or survive.

However, after reflecting on the aforementioned events it really saddens me to think that many innocent lives were snatched away under these circumstances.

My thoughts are with everyone that lost their life, the people still missing and all their respective friends and family.

A lack of communication can really be the difference between life and death.

Amar Garcha