Whats in a name?

'What's in a name? That which we call a rose by any other name would smell as sweet.'

Shakespeare wrote this. He is trying to tell us that our names do not matter and it is only what we do that’s important. It would be foolhardy to argue that our actions are not relevant but to imply that our name means nothing is in my opinion equally so. Let me tell you a story.

A young man travels to rural Africa. He spends three months teaching English in the harsh, poverty stricken area of Kezi, Zimbabwe. He builds up phenomenal relationships that cross the cultural divide and through his teaching, feels he has made a rare connection with the men and women he had the privilege of interacting with. It’s an experience he will never forget.

On his last day, he attends a dinner designed to bid him farewell. All of the people he has met and taught are in attendance. He spends time speaking to all of his students, who when he first arrived were unfamiliar faces but now were dear to his heart. Towards the end of the meal a young man approaches, someone he’s known for three months and who he could spot in a large crowd. The young man asks him something that changes his entire trip…for the worst.

‘Can you remember my name?’

He freezes. His face now a shade of crimson as he is gripped by the embarrassment he has bought upon himself. In his mind, he scrambles and claws for a name that doesn’t come, an excuse fails to present itself and even the most basic words cannot force their way out of his mouth. For what seems like an eternity all he can do is look into the eyes of a young man whom he thought he knew so well, and yet it is in that moment that it dawns on him that without this one simple piece of information, he barely knows him at all. He manages to say three words, three pitiful words, to which the young man walks away dejected.

‘No…I’m sorry’

Since then he has never underestimated the importance of knowing someone’s name. Thankfully for him, he has just started working for Dale Carnegie and is currently doing the ‘Dale Carnegie course.’ The first session made him more passionate in his belief that it is not enough to know people as ‘he’ or ‘she.’ He was provided with fantastic techniques for remembering names and by using those methods he was able to recite the names of all 19 people doing the programme with him.

He walked away encouraged and with a smile on his face, knowing that 19 more people no longer knew him as ‘he.’ They knew him as Brett Mills.


Brett Mills

What's Your Name?

You might think what's in a name? It doesn't determine who you are or how you act, but for as long as people can remember, a person's name has been important to them. A recent article on the BBC website - 1066 and all those baby names - talked about how we still use names from the time when the Normans invaded; after the invasion many babies were named after William the Conqueror as the name was assosciated with success and this name is still popular today.

When someone hears their name spoken it makes them feel special and important, but many of us don't take the time to remember people's names or even to use people's proper names. Often we bump into people we have met before and then can't remember their name, not only is this embarrassing for us but it also makes the other person feel insignificant and unimportant. By not remembering somone's names we immediately alienate ourselves from that person.

Dale Carnegie's third principle from the book 'How to Win Friends and Influence People' says -

Remember that a person's name is to that person the sweetest and most important sound in any language

It's simple, people that remember people's names and use them are well liked and achieve more. A manager who has a team of over thirty and remembers the name of every member of his team will have earned the respect and attention of that team.

Here are some simple techniques that can help you to remember people's names -

1. 
   
   When you are introduced to someone, listen when they say their name and ask them to repeat it if you don't catch it the first time.


2. 
   
   When you first hear the name, repeat it several times in your head.


3. 
   
   Associate the name in your mind with the features, expression and appearance of that person.
   

When it comes to dealing with people, just by remembering and using their names you will be well on the way to building good relationships.

For more useful tips like this attend a complimentary preview of the Dale Carnegie Course on 17th August. Click here for more information

Sophie Whittall
Admin & Marketing Co-ordinator
www.London.Dalecarnegie.com

Ready...Steady....Go!

The sun is shining and the air is filled with the sounds of cheers and whistles. The roads are clear of cars and there are people lining both sides of the street, crammed together and craning their necks to catch a glimpse of the runners. I’m at the London 2010 marathon.

The atmosphere is electric and everyone around me is happy and excited, everyone is here for the same reason to cheer on the people brave enough (or you could say mad enough!) to run 26 miles around London. Most of the people running are doing it to raise money for their chosen charity, their commitment and enthusiasm is inspiring – some are even going that bit further and running it in fancy dress as camels or chickens.

The crowd of on-lookers are not only here to support their loved ones but to support absolutely everyone who is running and they are a great example of Dale Carnegie’s principles for becoming a friendlier person. I have never been anywhere where everyone is so kind, generous and friendly to complete strangers; on marathon day London is the friendliest city you will ever go to!

Principle 3 – Arouse in the other person an eager want.

If the crowd saw someone struggling they would shout to egg them on and give them a pat on the back as they ran by.

Principle 6 – Remember that a person’s name is to that person the sweetest most important sound in any langauge.

Lots of the runners had their names written on their tops and the crowd shouted out their names with words of encouragment – ‘Come on Sue, your over half way.’ This made the runners feel important almost like they were famous and gave them that extra bit of adrenelin to keep on running.

Priniciple 5 – Smile

It may seem like such a small thing but just a smile from a stranger can really help to keep someone going as they reach mile 20 and begin to hit the pain barrier.

Why not try using these principles all the time and perhaps we can make London feel like its marathon day everyday!

Sophie Whittall
Marketing & Admin Co-ordinator
www.London.dalecarnegie.com