The difference between confidence and nerves.

As I am coming up to the half way point of the Dale Carnegie course I thought I could use this blog to maybe describe one of the key breakthroughs I have made so far. The course is designed to develop a variety of skills and mentalities which in turn will be beneficial in your relationships with others, enable you to project confidence and maintain a positive attitude in all situations.

I have recognised through the presentations I have made on the course and speaking to others partaking that we all get nervous. Whether its presentations or something entirely different, I don’t know anyone who does not get nervous at some point. I use to think that by being constantly nervous I was somebody who suffered from a lack of confidence but would often be given good feedback in the areas I thought I was not confident in.

I have come to realise that nerves are more related to the significance of an event and confidence is linked to our preparation for it. If I have to give a presentation on a particular subject and I’m not prepared, then I will be nervous and have no confidence in myself to carry out the presentation. If I have prepared for the presentation then I have total confidence in my ability to deliver a good presentation but it does not stop me from feeling nerves.

I have learned to welcome the feeling of nerves in any scenario in life as for me it underlines it is something of importance. If I don’t feel confident about my ability to get through it, then I need to find what’s missing in order to rectify it.

I would encourage you to embrace nerves as a means of motivation. Next time you have a presentation and you feel nervous…good, it means that what you are doing is important to you! Next time you have a presentation and you don’t feel confident…work out what is missing, change it and give yourself the confidence that you have all the tools to give the presentation of your life.

Brett Mills

What's Your Name?

You might think what's in a name? It doesn't determine who you are or how you act, but for as long as people can remember, a person's name has been important to them. A recent article on the BBC website - 1066 and all those baby names - talked about how we still use names from the time when the Normans invaded; after the invasion many babies were named after William the Conqueror as the name was assosciated with success and this name is still popular today.

When someone hears their name spoken it makes them feel special and important, but many of us don't take the time to remember people's names or even to use people's proper names. Often we bump into people we have met before and then can't remember their name, not only is this embarrassing for us but it also makes the other person feel insignificant and unimportant. By not remembering somone's names we immediately alienate ourselves from that person.

Dale Carnegie's third principle from the book 'How to Win Friends and Influence People' says -

Remember that a person's name is to that person the sweetest and most important sound in any language

It's simple, people that remember people's names and use them are well liked and achieve more. A manager who has a team of over thirty and remembers the name of every member of his team will have earned the respect and attention of that team.

Here are some simple techniques that can help you to remember people's names -

1. 
   
   When you are introduced to someone, listen when they say their name and ask them to repeat it if you don't catch it the first time.


2. 
   
   When you first hear the name, repeat it several times in your head.


3. 
   
   Associate the name in your mind with the features, expression and appearance of that person.
   

When it comes to dealing with people, just by remembering and using their names you will be well on the way to building good relationships.

For more useful tips like this attend a complimentary preview of the Dale Carnegie Course on 17th August. Click here for more information

Sophie Whittall
Admin & Marketing Co-ordinator
www.London.Dalecarnegie.com