Leaders don't Bully

‘The Secret to being a great leader isn’t to bully or harrass your underlings – it’s to be a sensitive listener.’ (David Derbyshire – Daily Mail – 15th September 2010)

The above quote is from an article published in the Daily Mail this week which talks about two pyschologists research into 85 self-help books and biographies. Their findings show that most leaders secrets of success are ‘touchy feely’* and that the leaders themselves are ‘positive and inspirational.’* Doctor Peters one of the Psychologists who carried out the study says that their findings from the research go against the belief that ‘the best leaders were driven individuals with domineering personalities’* She said ‘Actually, it’s someone who is always looking to their followers and who is concerned about their relationship with them.’

Dale Carnegie is one such leader who’s principles and ideas agree with this research and have been used for nearly a hundred years. When it comes to listening he has unearthed that there are 5 levels – Ignore, pretend, selectively, attentively, empathetically. Here are some of Dale Carnegie’s principles for being a leader –

- Begin with praise and honest appreciation.
- Talk about your own mistakes before criticising others.
- Praise the slightest improvement and praise every improvement. Be "hearty in your approbation and lavish in your praise."
- Give the other person a fine reputation to live up to.
-Make the other person happy about doing the thing you suggest.

So the key to being a good leader is not to dominate but to build and sustain good relationships with your team. Leaders who dictate will eventually lose their position as leader.

If you would like to learn more about becoming a successful leader then why not join us at a preview of our Leadership Training for Managers Programme on 23rd September. Click here for more details.

To read the full article in the Daily Mail - Click here

* David Derbyshire – Daily Mail – 15th September 2010

Sophie Whittall
Marketing & Admin Co-ordinator

www.London.dalecarnegie.com

A Dogs Life!!

So I was sat in my living room, multi-tasking (watching a re-run of friends on the box and sending some tweets on Twitter to the world at large) when, SUDDENLY it dawned on me as I was checking out the plethora of “auto responses” from people claiming to be my “followers”!! Our generation is losing the human touch not because we have to but because the choice is made easy.

We have on-line chat rooms, e-learning, on-line shopping and on-line-check in, on-line dating and on-line takeaway booking and so on and so on. All of these great technologies could mean that we never ever have to leave the house or speak to a real person ever again, for some this is heaven on earth.

The people I often meet in the training room are driven individuals who want to overcome challenges and achieve more in life for themselves and their businesses. This is the same profile that would fit individuals who were taking Dale Carnegie Courses over 90 years ago. The fundamental challenges that we face with human beings and building relationships remain the same as they did back then, they are just contained within a different social setting and have a few more gadgets involved.

After training hundreds of people, there is one undeniable fact, when a group of people get together there is a great shared experience and connection that could not be replicated on-line. There is also a real buzz and energy created when people share challenges and solutions and overcome their fears.

So in conclusion, let’s celebrate technology for the freedom it gives us. Let’s also ask the question, “Do I sometimes use technology to avoid dealing with people?”...maybe in this instance we are actually restricting our freedom of expression.

There is a man in my life who always chooses people over technology and he has an amazing ability to “Win Friends and Influence People” effortlessly and with energy. If we could throw the same level of energy into meeting new people that he does then surely we could achieve anything. Please welcome Archie the dog!

Hayley Kennedy
Consultant

http://www.london.dalecarnegie.com/